Questioning, which I suppose is kind of my thing.

It's been almost a month since my last significant post. I've been away mostly because I've had a lot of serious stuff on my mind and have needed to come to some conclusions and talk to some people before I wrote anything public about it. Turns out the 'process of discernment for ordination to the priesthood' isn't over yet - or at least hasn't led me where I expected at the present juncture. Here's where I am, in part:

I haven't officially quit the process, but I've decided to pull back. I didn't apply for the DMin program I was thinking about, I've dropped out of Seattle U., I'm leaving my job working for the Diocese at the end of the month, and I've talked to my bishop about creating some space this year to figure out whether I want my career to be in the church. I'm keeping my job in youth ministry because I like the community and I love the kids, but I am also looking for at least half of my employment in the immediate future to happen outside of the church. I've been close to this point several times in the discernment process, but now I'm taking the plunge. I've talked to a lot of people about it, but it's been completely my decision.

If you're a regular reader, or if you know me well, you probably aren't terribly surprised about this (nobody I talk to seems to be), and you also probably know that I agonized over taking this step much more than I needed to. I don't have a big post in me tonight, but there is of course more to the story and I'm sure I'll write more later. It is a big thing for me, and it's the first big step that I've taken away from ordained ministry since graduating from college.


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Adventure Mom said…
Ok, it's been a month since you posted this blog. Are you still sure this is the right step for you? What God wants for you, or what you want for you? Just wondering what's been going through your heart and mind lately.
Unknown said…
Yeah - I'm really comfortable with the decision actually. I still have a few things to sort out regarding the direction I'm heading from a career perspective, but from a vocational perspective I feel a lot more comfortable now than I did a few months ago.