Ohio is for Losers

I don't usually blog on sports, but since I'm on a roll tonight...I don't know why no one has picked up on the story of Ohio sports in 2007. It's been an absolutely crushing year for Ohio fans, to the point that one prominent blogger (me) has suggested to friends that God in fact hates Ohio, and is using sports failure to force all Ohioans and descendants thereof to commit suicide.

It started with Ohio State's football humiliation vs. Florida (aka Sunny Ohio) in the national championship game. Then came the Ohio State basketball collapse vs. Florida in the national championship game. Then, of course, the Cleveland Cavaliers' humiliation vs. the Spurs in the NBA finals (followed by LeBron James, Cleveland's only source of hope, wearing a NY hat to a Yankees/Indians game, signaling to many that he's headed to NY as soon as his contract comes up). Now the Indians take a 3-1 lead on the Red Sox, and absolutely collapse--destroyed in games 5-7. Ohio State football (currently ranked number 1) is destined for defeat against Michigan in the last game this year. I'm betting on it.

Now, you may be saying, "But Ohio teams have made it to the championships in 4 sports this year! That has to be good, right?!" Wrong!! It's worse than if our sports teams had been content in mediocrity, with everyone else from Ohio! When you don't have a reason to hope, it's not so bad when you're disappointed. Midwesterners as a whole are pretty much used to it. But being brought to the edge of ecstasy 4 times in one year, only to have your hopes crushed in humiliating fashion?! Ohioans will never hope again.


Anonymous said…
Ohio is for losers. You could have left it at that. Is there really any need for explanation?
Anonymous said…
at least we can always count on the reds and the bengals to consistantly suck it up!
Unknown said…
See, this is the thing--Ohio is the kind of place that continually gets kicked, even while it's down. Pile on everyone!