Song of Seattle

So yesterday at the bus stop, I saw a normal looking man with a rabbit on his shoulder. I immediately thought of the friendly old gentleman from "Song of the South", but apparently it wasn't him.

A woman approached him and asked if she could pet it. Kindly, he said yes, and they started up a conversation about the rabbit. "Pretty animal", "very calm", yada yada yada. Then, the conversation turned to people's reactions to it. Apparently, carrying around the rabbit was making this fellow angrier and angrier, because he talked for ten minutes about the stupid questions he gets.

"'Hey, is that a rabbit', people will ask. No, it's not a rabbit you moron! Or the other good one that everyone asks is 'Is that real?' Come on! Of course it's real!"

I'm glad I didn't ask. This gnarly homeless guy would probably have been glad that he didn't ask either, but in fact he did.

"Hey, is that a rabbit on your shoulder?", the gnarly homeless guy says.

(Pointing at the guy and turning to his conversation partner) "Is that a rabbit!? No, it's not a rabbit. This is just what I was talking about!"

Homeless guy responds as he walks away, "Do you think I'm some kind of idiot you stupid @$$h0(&".

Rabbit guy: "I'm sorry, I just don't answer stupid questions! See, people are so stupid. They never stop bothering me. What kind of idiot asks 'is that a rabbit'. Doesn't it look like a rabbit? Hello! It's a rabbit!"

Just then, a taxi cab drives up, and the Ethiopian driver rolls down the passenger side window to yell out. "Hey, is that a rabbit?"

Rabbit guy: "Is that a rabbit?! What? Is that a yellow cab you're driving? It's funny, you're taking your time and there's not even a fare in your car! Is that a rabbit?! Why don't you keep on driving?"

The car drives off, and I kind of back away from the guy, so I pass out of earshot of the conversation. However, I did overhear him say when an apparently nice old lady sat down to pet it, "Well lady, you're still an idiot!" She got up and left.

When we got on the bus, the guy sat down next to another gnarly looking homeless guy, with whom he immediately bonded when the guy started petting the rabbit. "Hey, are you an animal person?", he asks, "because animals can tell these things. That's the type of person I want to sit next to on the bus anyway. I could tell you're an animal person".

And we all lived happily ever after. True story.

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